How do I continue to get healed, whilst hanging out with the unhealed?

This is something that I have really been pondering lately, especially since my journey to heal my life has brought me to some intense breakthroughs and insights within the last week. One of these is just this; How do I hang out with people in my life who are unhealed, or not opting into an intentional accountable life. Specifically, how do I do it without leaving my path, which is worth my life, but then also not make them wrong, not put them through an unrequested therapy session, or worse, free their mind before it is time. This is huge considering there are some very important relationships in my life that are not expendable. Such as family and another common area like work. As I ponder this, let me first say that I have tried the others to no avail. I have been falling off the wagon of my life for years, in the range of high 20s, being 33 now, and that most certainly has not made me happy or satisfied. This is what I consider the default choice, since being habitual means reacting and acting out, and since this was the way I was taught, this is what happens when I do nothing. As I said, this does not work for me as a long term way of being. The next option I tried was making others wrong or different. In this way I, usually passively, assert that I am different than they are in this way or that, not even better than in all cases, alot of the times I might have made myself "lesser" by a particular standard, especially if this was the safer or more comfortable path for me. Martyrdom falls into this category. This gives the illusion of satisfaction, but only for a short time as it is an incomplete, typically inauthentic, and almost always very thin veil. The next option, is a very familiar method, and the one I most identify with as where I am at right now, but on the way out of. It is one where I readily and easily make myself the same as the person, immediately identifying the specific ways that I am that or how I act that way, but in a very raw, messy "therapy session" type dialogue. I make the other person part of my process of working through this topic with me, exposing all of the guts and gears of myself. It is usually fairly complete and accountable, to the most extreme of over complete (TMI type stuff) and excitedly, almost manic accountability. Now, this method is a very delicate one that I have now realized is reserved for very specific relationships that either require this or with those select few who are healed enough to either hear all of it or at least to intentionally request the brakes be put on and that they not be a part of this. The final option, is one of utter rudeness, disregard, and almost mean-spirited. In an attempt to protect myself from both falling off of my journey, but also from doing my actual real work on myself, I remove layers of blockage for the other person without the request having been made too. I expose truths, pop bubbles, dismantle beliefs, all my truths, bubbles and beliefs, mind you, but in the presence of this person, knowing full well that they will be impacted. And, actually, if I am willing to really tell on myself, is the root of the attachment that I have, for them to get something about themselves, about how they are hurting me, disrespecting me, or dishonoring me in some way, so as to have them stop it so that I can hang out with them and not be uncomfortable. All a very slick way to avoid just saying the actual truth: "So and So, you hurt my feelings." Now all of these options so far are not happy, fulfilling options, and almost invariably alienate the other, less healed person, in some way, either minor (me going off track), to moderate (me making them wrong/different), to the extremes (therapy session or mind freeing). This brings me to the final option, one by process of elimination should be the happier, more fulfilling option, whereby I leave the other person alone in their chosen path, being willing to really be quiet and listen to my own guidance and speak what is true for me at any given moment. To not need them to do anything different, but in fact to realize that their behavior and how I am processing it, at every turn, is a curriculum of advanced "loving in the most difficult places" for my training. In this place, I allow the person all of the space to be, do say anything they need, honor myself fully and stir towards all that serves me, and also speak less and use the least amount of words, which I find to be a much more powerful and effective way to communicate with others. Now, all I have to do is keep practicing it every day.